So, as I mentioned before I left, I had only taken one trip that required air travel in the past. I did not enjoy the experience and was not at all looking forward to trying it again...especially alone. AK was too sweet...he helped me check in and took me to the security point and was way helpful. Sometimes he is great. I asked my doctor (the one AK took to a party a few years back while I was waiting at home all night) to give me some drugs for the trip. Now, I have never taken anything like that. I barely ever take anything other than by birth control and sometimes a migraine pill. THOSE THINGS ARE GOLD. I was so relaxed and although I did not love it, I made it through the experience by myself and without crying (which I did the first time...ha.)
Funny story even: So, on my connecting flight in Denver, I popped another pill during my 2hr wait as instructed. When I was firmly buckled in my seat on the plane I decided to "rest my eyes" until we started the take off process, which I despise. I was so annoyed and sat up because I could hear people talking and walking around and I wanted to get that damn ride over, so I was thinking "I wish you people would just sit down and shut up so we could take off already!!!" When I opened my eyes I realized it was the flight attendants offering drinks to everyone and that we were about a 1/2 hr from our destination!! :) I missed the entire take off and most of the ride. THOSE THINGS ARE GOLD. I totally get it why people become addicts now!!!
Next up: The long ride home!!!
Friday, February 02, 2007
Wednesday, January 31, 2007
Don't call it a comeback...I've been here for years!!
HI GUYS!! I am back. Lots to tell.
Sundance rocks. Everyone should check out Park City during Sundance at least once. It was so great. The wealth was sickening. LOVEIT. Me being the real estate lover that I am, I found great interest in the market out there. Most everything was 1 mill or UP!! 28 mill for one home I looked at. In my dreams people!!
There were horses that I hung out with a tad in the BACK YARD...oh yeah, and you could see mountains out every window and they were so close you could be there within five minutes!!
I spent a lot of time with my brother and his new fiancee. YEP. She asked HIM. I really like her a great deal. Third time is a charm I guess. I hated his first two choices that failed miserably!!
Anyways, I got to know her as she was my co-driver on the trip home!! I was the only one that could drive though (stick shift...she won't even try)...and let me tell you THAT was a story in and of itself. I will make that a different post as it will take a lot of space!!
This trip was SOOOOO what I needed. Really. I needed to PHYSICALLY get space from AK. I needed to SEE that there was more to life across the board...not just tell myself that. I saw where I WANT to be...and where I am keeping myself. I feel rejuvenated!! YES!!!!!!!!
I missed DDG and cannot wait to see him. I fell out of love with AK. I am ready to study for my real estate exams. I am ready to get in the best physical shape of my life. YES!!!!!!!!!!
DDG and I talked quite a bit while I was gone and I found myself liking him quite a bit. I had LONG conversations with Amy (my brother's fiancee) and I FEEL like I love AK a lot, but I am not IN LOVE with him right now. I am not sure if that will ever come back, but part of me feels relief. The spell has been broken. I do not ACHE for him the way I used to. I feel like I have let go a lot more. I know I have more work to do, but I told him last night. He was sad. He knows this is big because through thick and thin I have never "fallen out of love" with him. I never even knew what that really meant. It feels ugly. I shared this with him because he started going to a specialist yesterday...for sex addiction. He shared what the guy said to him and the plan of action. I am SOOOO Happy for HIM. Before I wanted it for US, and I told him that. I told him that I MAY BE able to try again with him someday, but that it would need to be from square one and when we were both healed and healthy. I know I have THOUGHT that I had reached this point before, but now I FEEL it. I did not get that there was a difference until now. No clapping people, I still have a ways to go before the saga of AK and Mack can be put to rest!!
For now it is on permanent hiatus though, and I FEEL GOOD!!!!!!!!!!It is a tragedy though. We do really love each other more than any other human being...
Part of this is because I realized that I will turn 32 in April. That hit me hard. He cheated on me just before my birthday last year. ONE FULL YEAR OF WASTE...and I don't want another. I told him I feel that I am DISGUSTED and DISSAPPOINTED in both of us for WASTING our lives like this. He agreed. My year of accomplishment just got the energy that it needed.
This thing is getting really long, so I will continue later.
Glad to be back...can't wait to read up on what is happening with all of you.
Sol, I am SOOOO behind with you...HELLO hot guy though. Get a little play, you deserve it.
Kate, You are quite the sexpot my friend...my face was red reading last night. I am happy for you!!!
MT, So sorry dude. Just like you hate AK...I hate that Bitch. Sorry but I do...for hurting you and the way she went about it, not for being herself!! Now go out and get youself a little play yourself...they are lining up I hear!!!
That is all I could get to last night, but I am dying to hear the scoop on everyone else also.
Give me the gossip. :)
Sundance rocks. Everyone should check out Park City during Sundance at least once. It was so great. The wealth was sickening. LOVEIT. Me being the real estate lover that I am, I found great interest in the market out there. Most everything was 1 mill or UP!! 28 mill for one home I looked at. In my dreams people!!
There were horses that I hung out with a tad in the BACK YARD...oh yeah, and you could see mountains out every window and they were so close you could be there within five minutes!!
I spent a lot of time with my brother and his new fiancee. YEP. She asked HIM. I really like her a great deal. Third time is a charm I guess. I hated his first two choices that failed miserably!!
Anyways, I got to know her as she was my co-driver on the trip home!! I was the only one that could drive though (stick shift...she won't even try)...and let me tell you THAT was a story in and of itself. I will make that a different post as it will take a lot of space!!
This trip was SOOOOO what I needed. Really. I needed to PHYSICALLY get space from AK. I needed to SEE that there was more to life across the board...not just tell myself that. I saw where I WANT to be...and where I am keeping myself. I feel rejuvenated!! YES!!!!!!!!
I missed DDG and cannot wait to see him. I fell out of love with AK. I am ready to study for my real estate exams. I am ready to get in the best physical shape of my life. YES!!!!!!!!!!
DDG and I talked quite a bit while I was gone and I found myself liking him quite a bit. I had LONG conversations with Amy (my brother's fiancee) and I FEEL like I love AK a lot, but I am not IN LOVE with him right now. I am not sure if that will ever come back, but part of me feels relief. The spell has been broken. I do not ACHE for him the way I used to. I feel like I have let go a lot more. I know I have more work to do, but I told him last night. He was sad. He knows this is big because through thick and thin I have never "fallen out of love" with him. I never even knew what that really meant. It feels ugly. I shared this with him because he started going to a specialist yesterday...for sex addiction. He shared what the guy said to him and the plan of action. I am SOOOO Happy for HIM. Before I wanted it for US, and I told him that. I told him that I MAY BE able to try again with him someday, but that it would need to be from square one and when we were both healed and healthy. I know I have THOUGHT that I had reached this point before, but now I FEEL it. I did not get that there was a difference until now. No clapping people, I still have a ways to go before the saga of AK and Mack can be put to rest!!
For now it is on permanent hiatus though, and I FEEL GOOD!!!!!!!!!!It is a tragedy though. We do really love each other more than any other human being...
Part of this is because I realized that I will turn 32 in April. That hit me hard. He cheated on me just before my birthday last year. ONE FULL YEAR OF WASTE...and I don't want another. I told him I feel that I am DISGUSTED and DISSAPPOINTED in both of us for WASTING our lives like this. He agreed. My year of accomplishment just got the energy that it needed.
This thing is getting really long, so I will continue later.
Glad to be back...can't wait to read up on what is happening with all of you.
Sol, I am SOOOO behind with you...HELLO hot guy though. Get a little play, you deserve it.
Kate, You are quite the sexpot my friend...my face was red reading last night. I am happy for you!!!
MT, So sorry dude. Just like you hate AK...I hate that Bitch. Sorry but I do...for hurting you and the way she went about it, not for being herself!! Now go out and get youself a little play yourself...they are lining up I hear!!!
That is all I could get to last night, but I am dying to hear the scoop on everyone else also.
Give me the gossip. :)
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